Believe it or Not
12 June 2006
Nicole is getting married in the dark in Sydney at the end of this month.
Can you believe that news flash? Getting married in the dark so that the paparazzi can’t take any photos, I mean.
If you do, then you’re a bigger mug than me. Come on! Who would get married in the dark, particularly in gorgeous, sunny Sydney, Australia? That’s an oxymoron along the lines of a state funeral in a fun park.
Besides, if Nicole’s wedding were in the dark then none of her guests would be able to see her dress, or anyone else’s dress for that matter. Nor would they be able to see Keith, the groom.
If you’re not familiar with Keith Urban, Nicole’s hubby-to-be, then let me alert you to the fact that he’s worth a very big gawk - as in he’s all over Tom in the uber-handsome department.
You know there’s actually a magazine dedicated to celeb weddings. I discovered it last week, in the mag section of corporate stronghold Borders, while browsing the monthlies for Cancer’s birthday forecast.
It’s my birthday coming up Bloggers. Right around the time Nicole marries Keith.
There’s bound to be something auspicious about that, i.e. on June 28th, when I park my bum in front of my computer to check for birthday emails, chances are my news page will have posted pics of Nic marrying Keith, which means I’ll be able to squint like a blind person at dim-to-dark vis-à-vis indeterminate images of the happy couple, and eat my cake too!
Can’t imagine any of the mags haggling over shadowy shots of Nic’s wedding to the tune of four million. Even if the upcoming celeb marriage is on par with Brad and Angelina’s celeb baby, surely underexposed photos can’t be of any value.
But this is America, where big-hearted celebs do things like donate the money from the sale of their wedding and newborn baby photos to worthy charities.
I’m sure Nicole has a big heart. So I bet she’ll come out from the dark, stand under the sunny blue skies of Sydney, hang onto Keith’s hand, look gooey, and smile at the paparazzi, just so she can donate the wedding pic money to a needy cause.
In turn, publishable photos will give curious-types like me the chance to dash back to Borders for the summer issue of celeb weddings and some quality gawking at … Keith!
