Feral Chin Hair
10 August 2006
Recently I watched the movie Transamerica.
There is a scene wherein transiting-from-male-to-female protagonist, Bree (as in cheese), has a couple feral hairs removed from her nostril by his/her son’s friendly neighbor who just happens to be adept at electrolysis.
It reminded me that feral facial hairs are a social disaster along lines of totally humiliating – if they’re behaving feral-like, i.e. poking out from spots where they shouldn’t even be growing!
In Bree’s situation unruly and protruding nostril hairs are normal for the gender she’s abandoning, but not normal for the gender she’s becoming. I mean we girls don’t normally have to deal with overhanging nostril hair.
Now feral chin hairs are a different matter. Yep, you reach a certain age and the little buggers start cropping up and out. You might have noticed they begin appearing as early as 30!
Isa and I have made a pact. We’ve agreed that if one of us is hospitalized for a period of time, and unable to tend to matters such as personal grooming, the other will come in regularly – armed with tweezers – and go after feral facial hair in the manner of a hunter after the hunted.
I think this is an indication of the depth of our friendship.
FYI: Any exceptional and aggressive growth of facial hair is probably an indication of hormonal warfare to the degree that something is totally out of whack.
Being out of whack hormonally is not fun. For instance, elevated testosterone can cause feral facial and chest hair, deepening of the voice, and disqualification from all major sporting competitions, especially the Tour de France.
Competition sport and wanting to age without feral facial hair are changing the landscape of our body’s chemistry. Now we can do something to either supplement or diminish our hormones so the outcome is a winning edge, or a smooth face.
Eventually we’ll be able to not only manipulate our hormonal activity, we’ll also be able to engineer our genetics.
I bet I’m gunna sound like an old fuddy-duddy saying this, but when and if the time comes, I’d be happy if Isa just sticks to her side of the best girlfriend pact and hunts down my chin hair with a pair of tweezers.
